5 Things to do before this year ends

We are few days away from finally finishing 2016. What a year has been.

I, personally, had moments of extreme joy, tears, frustration but mostly- moments of personal growth. I learned so much about myself this past twelve months & speaking to others about how they year went the answer was almost the same. And I couldn’t be any happier for you, for finishing this year & surviving it. The struggles and difficulties are part of our life, as I wrote (almost a year ago) in this post.

New Year’s Eve it’s kinda emotional for me (and I don’t even know why). I have an especial “ritual” or a list of things I like to do before December 31st ends every year, and I thought that maybe they can help you to settle your mind to receive 2017 in the best possible way!

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Organize & clean

Through the year we use a lot of stuff and then we put it somewhere to be organized later, the problem is… we usually don’t. After some weeks our closets and desks are full of things we don’t even know where they came from. In my case, during college I made a mess of my computer desktop and I have thousands of files everywhere!

There’s no better feeling than starting a new year with your house organized because it helps a lot to keep your mind organized too.

 

Cross out achieved goals

As I have said it before, I love to cross out the things I’ve done (usually on my ‘to do list’) because I get an indescribable satisfaction. New Year’s Eve it’s not the exception, I cross out every goal I achieved during 2016, and so I begin the new year feeling extremely productive and unstoppable. You should definitely try it.

Settle new goals

Because how are you gonna do the last point if you don’t have a list!?

Also, let me explain myself of the importance of settle new goals each year (even though I think it’s pretty obvious). You are gonna built a house, you know the construction starts in a determined date; but you get to the lot without machines, engineers, money, nothing & still expect the house to be ready in a couple of months (?)- ok, maybe it’s an extreme example but you get the point.

If you want to have a sucessful year you need to know what are you gonna be working for, mark yourself a north to follow.

“If you are not planning for sucess, then you are planning for failure”. 

Make decisions

We make some bad decisions this year (and the year before, and the one before too…) but that doesn’t mean we can’t have  a fresh start and make some new good ones.

New Year’s Eve it’s the perfect oportunity to say “Ok, starting from now on I’m not going to…” or “I will start to… this year”. Everyone around you it’s making decisions so you get motivated to commit to them and make actual changes to improve your life.

Planning new habits

This one it’s new for me, so maybe you will want to join me! Last year I proposed myself to start drinking more water… and I failed- kinda actually. But I also wanted to get a habit of writing and I nailed it (because I started a journal).

So, the point is, habits change your life and sums up positive consequences. Excercising, reading, drinking water, healthy eating, writing, saving money… anything you know you did wrong during the past year and/or you want to start doing; it’s the perfect time.

I hope this “rituals” I have helped you to have a better start for 2017 (because 2016 was wicked…). Also, I pray that you have the best New Year’s Eve and spend it with your loved ones. See you next year!

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Benefits from keeping a journal and why you should start one

Hey everyone, it’s december already and that means this blog it’s almost one year older. It is amazing how time flies so quickly.

This year was a 12 month learning adventure in every area of my life. College, faith, relationships and myself (especially). And one of the things I learned was the importance of having a journal.

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(I took this photo myself, and I am so so proud haha)

It’s kinda funny because I am not a very constant writer and every time -as a kid- I tried to keep a journal I lost interest in two or three days. But, as a grown up I found out it was different. So, I thought it would be amazing if I can share the benefits I got from keeping a journal and invite you to start one too!

  • First benefit: I de-stress A LOT. 

I spend most of my time stressed out about so so many things and I can’t describe the relieve I got when I wrote down my thoughts. It doesn’t actually solve anything but it’s satisfactory to clear your mind that way. Let’s illustrate it this way -and apologies in advance for been a potterhead.

  • Second benefit: It’s easier writing than talking. 

If you are just like me and have problems sharing with others your thoughts and worries it’s “safer” to write them down. I usually believe people don’t actually get interested in my fears and concerns-and even opinions- so I tend to be very close-mouthed about them.

The good thing about a diary it’s that you can write WHATEVER you want without been worried to hurt someone’s feelings or been misunderstood; plus you get to externalize (sort of) what’s going on in your mind. It’s a win-win.

  • Third benefit: It can calm you down. 

I remeber one day I was so nervous before a visit from my supervisor (as a part of my professional practice) that I was close to throw up and I already had went to the bathroom like 3 or 4 times. So I sat down in my desk, took a deep breath and wrote down in my journal ALL that was crossing my mind- because I am the queen of overthinking- and after that I felt 1000x better. Plus, it is an awesome way to kill time during stressful and anxious moments.

  • Fourth benefit: You can put your week/month in perspective & learn from yourself. 

This is mainly focused in personal growth because you can see how your concerns change through time, how you can set new goals and as in my case you can say “Ok, I worried so much about this situation and I turned out to be so silly” and you learn to next time not freaking out that much haha.

  • Fifth benefit: It can drive you closer to God.  

At least in my experience this happened (since I’m a believer), but it was funny to see myself writing down my problems, whining and just liberating my thoughts- and then suddenly I was asking God to gave me strength, patience and telling Him how much I wanted Him to be in control of my life. Basically, I started praying without I even noticed. A BIG plus, for sure.

I hope my experience with this whole journal/diary thing actually helped you to open up your mind a little bit to how can improve your life, because honestly now I carry my journal everywhere I go.

Also if you are not a writting person but you want to experience the feeling of be in control and have a tidy mind I can 100% recommend you to try a bullet journal.  I, personally,  got a little bit addicted to it- which is is my opinion one of the greatest inventions humans have ever made in order to keep things organized. I will probably in the near future blog about it and how it changed my life. My friend Becca from Life As a Dare have an amazing post about it so you can learn more and join the Bujo community all around the world!

See you, hopefully, next week and have an amazing week! Feel free to email me for anything you might need.

 

Life update!

Well, Hello! Since I’ve been absent for-I don’t know… centuries already- I feel I should introduce myself again. LOL!

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Honestly I’m so so sorry I disappeared for so long and without an explanation. I tried, as hard as my human energy let me, to keep on blogging weekly or at least monthly. Sadly, and as you probably noticed, I failed.

So, since you have been so so patient with me and keep on reading my posts (& making me extremely happy for it) I felt I had to share with you this part of my life I’m going through and the reasons why I’ve been gone for this past months.

Okaaaay, let’s get to it:

1. I started working!- and quit.  

Before you can judge me let me explain myself. First of all, I wasn’t looking for a job -since I’ve always been really into be a full time student- but my college was hiring a receptionist (like a 9-6 pm worker WHOA!).

Long story short, I had an scholarship (for the last two years and a half) and they asked me if I wanted to work with them. And I said yes!

Of course when I started to work I had NO idea how tired I was gonna be and how much I was gonna miss my “me time”. Seriously people, working & studying (+ mantaining a social life) it’s not a piece of cake at all!

I really enjoyed my job, don’t get me wrong. I was so happy on my desk, helping people and I even woke up motivated everyday. The point is, I wasn’t in college to become a receptionist and working- even though was a incredible income for my family- wasn’t my priority.

After a few months I had to decided between keeping my job or finish my Bachelor on time. I guess you already know what I chose.

2. I’m currently on my last three courses for my Bachelor! 

Linked to the last point… I WILL ACTUALLY GRADUATE NEXT FEBRUARY! (Well, if I pass this last courses- but yeah, you get the excitement).

And of course, as you can imagine, I have tons of work to do daily and the triple to do during the weekends. Seriously, it’s crazy.

Since I’m studying special education I need to do a professional practice. In my school that implies I have to do a total of 150 hours of practice, from which 120 are me giving classes to the kids. And ladies and gentlemen I can only translate that into two simple words: STRESS & ANXIETY. But I’m just 6 weeks away from finishing! 😀

3. Adulting it’s hitting me like a tsunami. 

If you are going through these years you will definetely understand what I’m talking about. Responsabilities are tough, you have to learn to balance all the areas in your life (by yourself!), you have to make a ridiculous amount of decisitions and have to manage to look like you know what are you doing- but let’s be honest, NOBODY knows what they’re doing.

So, yeah… I’ve been trying to figure out how to settle my life these past months.

I admit during this time crossed my mind the idea of closing this blog, but I also realized that I didn’t wanted to throw away all the effort and time I put into it. Plus, I really like -and enjoy- writing and sharing my life with you! I can’t give up so easily! So here I am!

For sure I can’t promise I will post two times a week or so… but I’ll put my best effort to post more frecuently and work harder for this blog! Again thank you so much for your patience and support during the ten months this page has been up! 😀

 

 

What I’ve learned about social media while blogging

First of all, let me apologize for be absent during these past weeks. My life turned upside down in a matter of days and until now I am finally getting back to my track.

I got a job, I am on my last weeks of college and during this adjustment time I wasn’t able to manage all the blogging responsabilities (instagram included!), and I am so so sorry for that. I am working into improving, promise.

Now, let’s get into the point.

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What I’ve learned about social media while blogging. As a normal, regular, not-blogger person I am the definition of anxious and for me social media just adds more stress. But posting got a whole new meaning the moment I decided to start this blog.

Sometimes trying to others “like” your blog it’s overwhelming. And during this four months I’ve been posting I have learned a lot. That’s why I want to share it with you and maybe- just maybe- you can relate to me (:

  1. People want to know you, not just your content. This advice I read changed my instagram account. I used to upload photos – ONLY- about my blog posts. Then when I started uploading content about my daily life, food, plants, experiences; people liked. Liked much more than my lasts posts.
  2. You can’t compare yourself. I must accept I am guilty of this. I wanted so bad to be like the other bloggers I follow, with tons of followers (some of them in just a few weeks).Truth is, every case is unique and you gain nothing worring about how many likers you had; blogging is about enjoying the process of growth and learning NOT to waste your energies and mind.
  3. Phantom followers are real. Let me explain myself. Some people actually like your blog or account, but others are just hunting followers. They “follow” you just for you to follow back, then they unfollow you. At the start I got really mad about it, I perceived it as unloyal and even as cheating, then I realized that I should worry about them but should worry about my real followers.
  4. Don’t be too obsessive over what you instagram about. It’s really easy to get “like-drunk” (if that expression even exist-LOL). I learned that been posting all the time can actually separate you from the one’s you love, also it can unfocused you from posting – what it’s all about.
  5. Enjoy meeting new & different people. This have been my favorite feature about blogging, meeting people from all over the world and actually get to know them through the web.

This have been a part of what I have learned over this time. I have much more facts and lessons social media taught me over my journey, I would love to hear your own experiences and what you had learn.

6 Lessons you will definitely learn in college

Since I was small I dreamed of college; I wanted so bad to be a “grown up”. When I finished high school I had so many expectations of how my next year was gonna be. I started watching videos in youtube of how to study succesfully, hacks for college, how to decor your notebook, etc. You can picture how anxious I was of finally start my freshman in college!

Of course, my college experience had been different from the one I planned for me three years ago. Some of the videos I watched were useless or just didn’t fit my situation. Seriously, it’s hard to find tips or advices that work for everyone, but I realized that no matter your major, your college characteristics or the country you belong there are lessons that you learn through those student years.

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Photo from Wanderlass.com, isn’t it just perfect or what? 

Now, I want to share with you some of those lessons I have learned that were not included in the course contents (LOL).

  • You will have more extra time than in high school BUT you will spend that time doing assignments. It can be a class of 4 hours and a homework of 2 + a project of 8 hours or even more. It’s endless.
  • You will have less money than expected. I don’t know why but at college we spend more money on food (maybe because we are more anxious). Still, you will have a lot more to pay like the bus, food, books, presentations, materials, etc.
  • One’s bestfriends as an adult are usually made during college BUT they are a small percentage. You will meet many many people in this years, you might even like them, but truth is that during this years a lot of  situations can happen and as a result you and your friends can take different paths.
  • You find yourself doing things you didn’t know you could. Like organizing a fair and a festival, write a enormous essay, work half-time, read a couple of books during a month, or make choices (a lot of them, actually). At the beginning it might be hard to manage the time and one can feel overwhelmed, but as you overcome all the obstacules and you look back: the satisfaction it’s incredible and you also learn a lot of what you are capable of  do.
  • Professors are very different from high school BUT you can learn much more of them. I have been in courses with good and bad proffesors, both can teach you a lot of your career and about yourself. Some teach for your intellectual development and some teach you about life. Having a lot of proffesors can actually be something you can take advantage and learn more about patience, the kind of professional you want to become, effort, tolerance, respect and how different people can be in their opinions.
  • THE WORLD BECOMES BIGGER! Before college I believed I knew about how life was, how people lived; I thought I knew the answers to all the questions, that I had my life solved, that I had experienced all that was out there. One person told me when I finished high shool “there’s a whole new world that you don’t know, it’s so big and different you will not want to come back to this one”. And he was SO RIGHT! You meet new people all the time, you experience new situations every day, you have to take decisions -and they aren’t easy by the way. You are now an adult and the world sees you like one.

College can be overwhelming and take time to adjust yourself to the changes it brings, it is a big responsability but those are the best years of your life -yet.

If you know from your experience more lessons you learned in college (or that you are currently learning) please tell me! I will update the post.

See you next week, and good luck in your classes!

3 Wrong ideas I had about love that hurt me

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“We accept the love we think we deserve”
-Stephen Chbosky

Those words were constantly on my mind as I cried on my psychologist office. I had hurt the one’s I loved the most because I haven’t love myself enough (and first). It might sound cheezy but we can’t love others if we don’t have any love to give! Sadly, I learned the lesson in a tough way and I wished I’ve known it before.

I grew up in a place where love wasn’t usually expressed in a tangible way. No because we didn’t love eachother but because we weren’t quite expressive.

Even though I was taught that way, I am a romantic and loving person. I had some issues, I had to solve, but I did not on time.

It’s never too late, I am a proof of that, but I wish I had worked on myself before those issues turned into problems and lastly on offenses to the one’s I cared the most.

Now, had been say that. I can tell you some of the WRONG ideas about love I had, that were intoxicating me and my relationship with others.

  • “You must give yourself up”. I am a single mom daughter and I grew up watching my mom work so hard to give me what I needed. Often she told me that she loved me so much she had to work for us to be okay. Now, as a young adult, I understand what she meant. But I  translated that unto my life and, as a teenager, I became everyone’s keeper. I believed I had to give everything I was (both physically and emotionally) to the boy I liked so he may feel loved. WRONG. The result? I went dry and empty. You should never give the love you have for yourself to other person. No matter how much you love them, you can’t love someone more than you love yourself.
  • “If God had let me to be with him, it’s because he is the one”. Now I read that phrase and I laughed at myself for saying it so many times! I can’t defend myself for this, I was so blind to see it and I didn’t want to accept the fact that I had made a wrong decisition or maybe I just wanted to avoid the reality in which I was living. So, I excused myself and used God as my excused.
    Funny! Because at the beginning I didn’t prayed God to guide me on my relationship but then I was “blamming” Him for my situation.
  • “I can’t say no”. As I child I was taught to say yes to any favor and do it with a smile. Even though I wanted to say no. My mom and grandma were always runnin’ and in a hurry to do favors all the time. I guessed, as a child, that’s how it was supposed to be.
    Until almost two years ago I was unable to say no. I felt guilty when I did. In consequence I was doing thigs I didn’t want to for people I “liked” or just felt pity for them (I must admit the list include dates, kisses and unpleasant favors).

I can’t say everything was wrong in my love life. I fell inlove-and hard. I was being loved back-and a lot. But I wasn’t capable of accepting that loved, because I didn’t even know what love was truly about!

After I cheated my ex boyfriend and hurt not only him but a few more people and myself. I realized I had to do something. I started a psychology process that, honestly, changed my life and saved me from the path I was going. I learned about those unsolved issues I had and actually solve them. I started a real relationship with God, that helped me to know who I really am and what love is.

It have been almost two years since I divorce from my old self. I have a new relationship with God, me, family and my caring boyfriend. Now I can love with a more healthy love, and I honestly have never felt more loved. So, yeah! We actually accept the love we think we deserve.

We have legs instead of roots!

I have always used that phrase as my traveling motto. It sounds so “easy going” and just letting yourself go with the adventure. But, from a time ago I faced the whole “adulting” phase and that #YOLO motto I had made more sense in other perspective.

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It’s a whole metaphor. Picture a beautiful plant: it’s planted in a small pot, with moist soil, placed near a window where it gets sun rays for living. The owner of that cute plant take care of it and water it everyday; not too much water ‘cuz it drowns not any ‘cuz it withers. But, plot twist the owner sells the plant and the new owner it’s too lazy to take care of the poor plant. He leaves it in the sun for hours and do not water it, also smokes and use the plant pot as ashtray.

Poor plant, don’t you think? Abandoned by it’s owner, without being capable of made it’s food. Left there to die of thirst with no way out. Thanks God, we are not like plants and instead of roots we have legs. Or don’t we?

I know many people  (I am still struggling to break the cycle) that are uncapable of moving on. Moving on from toxic relationships, unhappiness, closing cycles, growing up and other examples you may know.

It is extremely hard to be in the position where you are aware you have to letting go or move on but be too tied to actually leave. I usually get use to my confort zone where I have all control but I don’t realize I am not able to progress, to persuit my goals.

Everyday I challenge myself and also encourge myself to letting go those people and habits that intoxicate me and focus in use this legs I have, to move on, to get out of the pot and avoid the Sun to boil me!

WE HAVE LEGS NOT ROOTS! We are aim to move, to saying goodbye and new hello’s, to discover new places that make us GROW & FLOURISH.

Let me know what meaning does this “motto” have to you! And thanks for reading!

Is life supposed to be easy?

Want to get home faster? Take a taxi.

Too lazy to read a whole book? Look for the movie.

Don’t want to get up and turn the lights off? Download an app for your smartphone.

Those are a few from the many examples we can find in our more and more demanding world of how machines or other people had made our life “easier”. If you don’t feel like doing some work at home, or at the office (even at school) you can pay others to do it for you. We have became lazy! I can picture us, humans, in a couple of decades paying others to take vacation for us or going to family dinners for us! It’s so so heartbreaking.

Sadly, the new generations are the one’s that are suffering the most out of this situation. For our grandparents, who grew up in a society in which you had to work for the things you wanted, having a phone, look for information in google and having an instant result instead of spending hours and hours in a library are luxuries notneeds!

Kids, teenagers and young adults are now so used to having fast results from little effort that when an action requires work and dedication easily lose interest or get frustrated.

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LIFE IT’S NOT EASY! And, it’s not meant to be. A woman entered labour for hours to give you life, you spend hours practicing crawling until you finally made one step by yourself, the same with your talking, writing, reading, and many other abilities we adquired from effort!

You can be sure that nothing worth having comes easily. If so, how can we appreciate them? Only a mother can love her child knowing how hard was to raise him/her.

Now that I am a little “more independent” and have my own money to spend it however I want, sometimes I surprised myself taking so much care  of a pen, a book, shoes, etc. just because I payed for them. Because only  I know how hard I had to work for it.

Just put everything into perspective: relationships, a house, work, a diploma, a car, an ability, whatever. You will probably enjoy it more when you realize the discipline, the hours (and money) it cost you.

Life it is not supposed to be easy, and that is fine. The more you want it, the more you will feel satisfy, the more ambitious you will become, bigger dreams, crazier goals, but full of illusion and motivation. We need challenges, because we crave for victories!

New year, new me?

 

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I must confese I am a “new me” freak. Yes, that’s right. On december 31, for the past 5 or 6 years, I’d sit down on my desk by my own and write down on a notebook a list of my goals for this year. Also, I checked last year’s list and have this little satisfaction moment in which I crossed out every goal I accomplished. Doing this kind of “ritual” give me a sense of control over myself, and prepare my mind to be super positive for the up coming year.

This year was diferent! I sat down on my desk and, with a blank page in front of me, I realized I did not know what I want to accomplished this year! I freaked out, I had the so called “NEW YEAR, NEW ME” crisis!

But hey! I know I am not the only one who struggles with this! So, I decided I wanted to share  with you what I did to give this conflict a solution.

  • Don’t stress out! Remember what you’ve go through

I know, because I experienced myself, that it can be overwhelming watch all new year’s resolutions people post on facebook or instagram and feeling lost. But, you should not feel weird or if it’s something wrong with you, because NOT! It’s complely fine, some people had hard experiences the past year (such as failing a course in college) and it is easier for them settle a goal in order to not repete it (like studying once a week or something like that).  I recommend you to think about mistakes or situations in which you think you can have had a better response and pick them as future goals for this year!

  • Settle realistic goals

Don’t let yourself be influenced by the whole “new me” mood. It’s hard, because everyone it’s happy, celebrating, feeling dreamy and very positive (don’t take me wrong that it’s completely fine), but maybe this can make you settle goals that can later in the year frustrate you and overwhelm you. So, it’s better if you choose four or five but that you know you can accomplish them with effort and have the satisfaction instead of being too ambitious and then feel sorry for it!

  • Talk about them with someone of your trust

One’s life and choices may look different from other’s point of view. You always can talk to a close friend or relative who can give you an advice of who well you went through the year and help you organize your ideas of what you would like to reach this coming one!

  • Do a brainstorm!

Of course! Do a list of some dreams or goals you have but without passing them through the “it’s impossible or not?” filter. Just write down the desires of your heart. Then, one by one you can examine them and determine if they are too ambitious to complete them in a year, if so it is an awesome idea to divide them into small “task” that help you go closer to the goal for the next two or three years!

I wish you the best of lucks setting up your goals and cross finger for you to accomplish as many as you can! Feel free to let me know what your goals are and what are you doing (or planning to do) for them to became truth!